Martin Hill Ortiz

Martin Hill Ortiz

The School for Dangerous Design

 Chapter One

Mister Specter

 

            "A ghost is here to see you," Nurse Shannon said in her gravelly voice before waddling off with the emptied lunch tray, leaving behind a sly smile.

            Reb perked up in her bed. A ghost? These last few days in the hospital had been so-o boring. Even with a phone for company, she could peck out only so many texts and view only so many videos. She wasn't like her school friends, rabid judges carrying out the never-ending cosmic duty of assigning likes or dislikes. To jokey photos. To songs. To Tik-Tok challenges and snarky comments. To Reb, it all seemed so repetitive a chore. So lame. And why couldn't you judge something as "kind of like, kind of hate"? And why not "who cares?"

            With her elderly roommate, Mrs. Menendez, one bed over, complaining about every bit of noise, Reb had resorted to watching the television mounted high on the wall with the sound off. Right now, a comedy show. Sort of. Silent actors mouthed lines and made goofy or shocked faces and paused for what must have been laughs. Reb thought it the weirdest thing on earth.

            The world is insane. The food here is terrible. And why am I even being forced to stay in this hospital? "You are lucky to be alive," the doctors told her after the explosion. Okay, but she wasn't sick or hurt and, other than missing a week of memory, nothing more bad had happened. Nothing that should keep her stuck in a hospital bed. 

            And why does everyone stare at me like I'm a freak? Her dad and her mom and Nurse Shannon and Doctor Ramirez winced when they saw her. Even Mrs. Menendez, who had a PVC tube sticking out of her chest, gave her a critical eye. And then there was how her friend Jenny had written on a get-well card—in handwriting so perfect it almost seemed snobbish—"Glad they found you." I was never lost. Was I?

            While waiting for her "ghostly" visitor, Reb spent a minute examining herself in a pocket mirror, thinking that maybe everyone else knew something she didn't. Nothing seemed different. All her human parts were in human places. 

            A man, more of a ghoul than a ghost, appeared in the doorway. Maybe sixty, he was skeleton-thin and dressed like the head of a funeral home: a black suit with a midnight-blue tie, knotted crisply and drawn tightly against his bulging Adam's apple. His arms dangled at his sides and his jacket sleeves were magician-sized, vast enough to hide a thousand scarves and several rabbits; the cuffs of a white shirt peeked out. His eyes bugged and were wide open, and as they shifted from side to side surveying the room, he seemed to think out each brief closing of their lids. 

            He's a cyborg and his eyes are cameras, Reb thought, each blink a snapshot. She glanced at Mrs. Menendez to see if she was weirded out. She slept, her mouth a lazy oval, drool running down her cheek.

Martin Hill Ortiz

THE ACT OF STORY STATEMENT

Rebecca "Reb" Hadley unwittingly creates a novel-type of explosive reaction in her high school chemistry class, blowing a hole in time. While she navigates friendships and enemies at a new school for promising engineers, she must figure out the formula for the explosion, ward off spies who want the secret, and survive the hazards of some dangerous school projects. After uncovering a plan to use her discovery as a weapon to blow up a local peace conference, she and her friends must foil the plot.

THE ANTAGONIST PLOTS THE POINT

There are several levels of antagonists. Part of the question is "Who can Reb trust?" Even her friends are under suspicion. The bioengineers are a snobbish group that play with life, including growing ever-larger centipedes. They conduct secret meetings called the "Kaboom Cabal," led by the rogue professor, Dr. Ezra Smalls. The school is funded by Zephaniah Claymont, a mysterious billionaire who made his fortune through chemicals and weapons. And then there is a mysterious ex-student who seems charming, but hangs around the school in spite of being expelled for some unknown reason. 

THE BREAKOUT TITLE

Okay, I believe I have a kick-ass title: The School for Dangerous Design.
 
I could include the name of my main character. If I did that, I would go back to an earlier version and call her Reb Radley and therefore, Reb Radley and the School for Dangerous Design. 

(I thought both Reb and Rad might sound like I'm trying too hard to be cool)

The School for Dangerous Design can be the series title. 

DECIDING YOUR GENRE AND APPROACHING COMPARABLES

The two genres are Dark Academia and YA.

The School for Good and Evil, Soman Chainani
Gates of Thread and Stone, Lori M. Lee

Let me deal with the elephant in the room: Harry Potter. My series contrasts with Harry Potter inasmuch as there is nothing magical that happens. It is science-based, albeit fantastical science (e.g., blowing a hole in time). While magic/fantasy does connect to wish fulfilment, that field is crowded. Fantastic science does have a charm of its own. For example, in my story a mechanical remotely-operated hand matches the role of "Thing" from the Addams Family. With a cell phone Velcroed to it, the heroes use it to sneak around and spy. 

The contrast with magic is part of the humor of the piece:

    "I invented a cloak of invisibility," Morgan said.
    "Really?" Reb asked.
    "It's called a light switch." Morgan turned it off. "Hide!"

Also, in contrast to Rowling, I have an important character who is non-binary. My definition of literature is "Anything Ron DeSantis would hate." 

CORE WOUND AND THE PRIMARY CONFLICT

Primary dramatic conflict that drives the plot. 
Insidious agents seek to learn Reb's formula for creating her explosion. They have in mind using it to bomb a peace conference. When they do learn the secret, Reb and her friends have to spoil the plot.

Personal conflict. 
Reb's mother is an alcoholic who cares little for her. Her father is loving but eccentric and embarrassing. She is insecure and doubts her own smarts.

Reb has always been a troublemaker and a screw-up. She believes she is a fraud and only got into the prestigious school because of an accident. She must learn self-confidence and discover that she is, indeed, quite bright. 

Tagline: After accidentally creating a new sort of explosion, Rebecca Hadley is recruited to an elite engineering high school where she must overcome her self-doubts and fight off sinister forces who seek to use her discovery for an evil plot.

OTHER MATTERS OF CONFLICT: TWO MORE LEVELS

Other conflicts. The bioengineers have been creating ever larger centipedes which have gotten loose in the school's cellars. But something worse is going on. An unknown predator is killing off the centipedes. 

Who is the mysterious boy who hangs around the school even after being expelled? Why was he expelled? Is he friend or spy?

Rebel's friend Samira wears bandages on her face after being injured in an accident. Will she be scarred for life?

THE INCREDIBLE IMPORTANCE OF SETTING

This is one of the story's strengths. The setting for The School for Dangerous Design is based on a real location. I can change enough details to make it a wholly new creation if that is necessary. In the 1880s, in the small town of Montezuma, New Mexico, an eccentric millionaire built a castle as a "dude" hotel. It is set up in the mountains and quite beautiful. It has gone on to become a private school. It sits nearby hot springs.

From there my story diverges. I name my school "Santa Febronia" (the patron saint of earthquakes), and it is run on geothermal energy. Deep in the sub-basements there are dynamos generating steam power. Formerly, being a Catholic school, it is run by a nun, Sister-Doctor Phang. 

The school is surrounded by wilderness. There is a nearby geyser. It has castle-like features and an ancient network of tunnels. 

The students, "nerds by the herds," are bright and often eccentric.

Not that far from Los Alamos, New Mexico, there is a connection to a history of dangerous engineering. One of the ingredients for the bomb was stolen from the Oppenheimer Laboratory.